Open Letter to my Sons

To Hayden:
It's tough being the youngest child... Constantly reaching towards maturity, but still wanting to hang on tightly to innocence and playfulness. It's tough growing up when you're the last in the family to have to do it. It's even tougher when your greatest example has been wise beyond his years, almost doing you a disservice by his watchful, protective hand. He has kept you from many of the growing pains that are inherent in this transition from childhood, seeing the many other kinds of pains you have endured in your youth.

It's not easy learning what real friends are when you've had bullies tormenting you for years. But you have them. You have good friends who care about you and are pulling for you: friends who have often experienced similar situations and have come out of them with strong identities. Don't overlook their caring expressions of friendship. Don't be so gun-shy that you misunderstand their outreach as something sinister. Grow up with them. It's easier to do together.

Hayden, you have one of the most caring, generous souls I have ever met. I aspire to your level of concern for others. You truly have the potential to be the peacemaker in our family, as your infant blessing foretold. You are such a treasure, and I can't imagine this family without the spice and joy that you add to the mix.

Good luck in Middle School, Son. Stay organized and alert, and don't live life in fear. If you manage to accomplish these simple goals, you will go incredibly far in life. I love you.

To Nathan:

You have certainly taken the proverbial lemons and made some mighty-fine lemonaid. I am so pleased that you chose to learn from the tough lessons of last year's academic downturn and risen-- nay, soared to the occasion at your new school. Your former choices to become apathetic and disorganized for a brief time are but a distant memory. I am thrilled to see the scholastic Rock Star return. Good luck in high school honor's classes.

Thank you for being such a good citizen of the world. You have been an example to others through your service and your caring, tolerant attitude. Your little brother has never been a burden to you, but a joyful companion. For that, we are all grateful. I love to hear you make him laugh, as his high pitched giggle is infectious.

We've arrived in the realm of your development where parents are wholly uncool. Yet (for the most part) you have remained respectful and continue to honor us. And for that I thank you. We may suck for a time in your mind, but never forget that our intentions are purely to bring you toward becoming a good man-- a goal which you are well on your way to achieving. I love you.

And to both of my boys:

I know how hard it has been to move so many times over the years. Inadvertantly, I have practically turned you into Army brats... never really giving you a home to settle into. My only hope is that the diversity of your experiences and the chance to learn to adapt will afford you life's lessons that would have otherwise gone untapped. I pray that you will love our final destination next year, and will enjoy the chance to put down roots without experiencing wanderlust. It might be awkward just staying in one place for so long.

I am so proud of you both. I love watching the young men that you are becoming, and have enjoyed the entire process of watching your development along the way. I will look forward to the next few steps, though my influence over you will quickly wane as you embark upon your last years living at home. I love you both more than words can possibly convey. Never forget that, no matter how old or independent you may become.

Love,

Mommy

Now come over here and give me a kiss or I'll kick your teeth in.